The Kid.





A wonderful combination of James and Nick

If you see James "the slide" Harbard:

1. Grab his cheeks and not let go for ten minutes. Punish him if he struggles.

2.Once released tell him he has some shit on his jumper making sure to point at it. When he looks down to inspect his jumper, punish him for his ignorance by flicking him in the face.

3. Yell something at him, something about him being a waste of space maybe, though this is just a suggestion your actual insult could be much closer to the heart. Try to really ruin his day.

4. Try and hurt him physically and mentally at the same time. If you have a working car make sure he knows about it and tell him about the long skate home he is faced with. Then perform a nollie smith on his foot.

5. Dick his board and throw it to the other side of the skate park/spot. Be sure to get somebody else do it as well. Guy Stokes is normally willing to help.

6. Every time he tries a trick, get in his way or push him off his board. If he pussies out let him know about it.

7. If hes trying an easy trick like a noseslide to fakie down a skatepark rail that he can normally do every try but is just having a bad day, roll up to the rail yell "The Burnorus!" and perform the trick first try, making sure you look like Silas Baxter Neil.

8. Tell him he has a "nice face." Be sure to sound sarcastic or at least laugh after saying it.

9. Ask him to play skate but make sure hes too scared to even think of doing a frontside halfcab flip because we all know you can't do them. If he does do one yell insults at him until he feels really bad even though the aim of the game is to do tricks your opponent can't do.

10. Finally, ask him to get the cigarettes from your car which is parked a good 50 meters away. Tell him he can have one if he gets them. When he gets them open them, show him that there's only one left and welcome yourself to flavour country.


i hate all of you

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